"Good Strategy and Advice for Getting and Keeping a Girlfriend"
August 22, 2011
FULL DETAILED REVIEW
This system is completely set up to get you the type of long term girlfriend that you aspire to - what Mehow calls your 'one(der) girl'. A play on words, as its popular to talk about your search for "The One" girl that fits you and you'll fall deeply in love with (also known as your soul mate).
It's good to see a product that focuses on this goal as this is exactly what most guys want, and this is a good attempt to put all the pieces you need in one box.
Keep in mind that this is an ambitious goal for one product and it's also the first attempt I've seen - hope to see more products like this.
Note: You can also buy this product as part of the NSA System (it actually just means you get the additional NSA content packaged together with the One(der) system content).
Good Approach and StrategyThe overall strategy and approach for getting a girlfriend in this program is solid. It outlines a mature and effective step by step process that will work if you put the time into it. Don't expect it to be easy of course - it takes work and so it should.
What makes it stand out is that it integrates concepts like social skills (aka social circle game) and steadily building a solid relationship with the girl you are interested in. Mehow spends quite a bit of time talking about the things you shouldn't do that could jeopardize having a solid relationship with her - this is just as important as telling you what to do.
Something to keep in mind is also that the system is aimed at getting high quality girls with lots of options. So it emphasizes the need for things like jealousy which are less necessary and can even mess up your chances if used with less challenging or 'in demand' women. Using jealousy needs to be calibrated to the girl, but Mehow doesn't discuss calibrating to the girl sufficiently. It's the one area of weakness in his approach that could use more information to make it easier to implement.
Tackles the Tricky Situations that May be Involved when You Want that One GirlOn a practical note, the system is set up with the intention of giving you the best chance of getting the one girl you want (rather than getting any girl). So it uses an approach that will avoid rejection and give you a higher probability of getting that one girl. It uses concepts like social circles and approach invitations to engineer this.
Typical dating advice tells you not to focus too much on any one girl - and explains that there is an element of playing the odds with dating as well. This system goes against that trend because it is set up for you to get the one girl you are really interested in no matter the situation. So instead of telling you to avoid the difficult situations and move on to a new girl, it gives you advice to make the best of the situation.
Typically this involves steps to take to minimize the problems (e.g. rejection and social repercussions) and some rules to follow.
Example situations include where your girl has been a long time friend that doesn't think of you romantically, your ex-girlfriend or someone you work with or the girl has a boyfriend already.
The advice was all spot on for these situations - excellent. See my comment on 'hidden gems' below for more on the advice on getting ex-girlfriends back.
Solid Mature Relationship Skills AdviceOnce you have your girl, you have still got to keep her. Module 4 of the program discusses relationship skills, conflict management and the day to day of what makes the relationship compelling for both of you so you stay together.
Overall this contained a lot of quality advice that will make a big difference in your ability to keep the relationship and make it a good experience for both of you.
While there wasn't a ton of detail, or lots of relationship theory here, Mehow manages to cover most of the important 'action items'. It is solid mature advice that works, and to date I haven't seen anything as comprehensive in the practical relationship skills area - great work.
There were a few gaps in the advice that if filled would have made this an outstanding product:
- - Lack of Example Situations: Especially for guys with little relationship experience it would have been really useful to talk through the typical situations and issues that come up more. There are a few examples, but it could've been a lot more comprehensive.
- - Fuzzy 10 Fundamental Needs: Mehow lists 10 fundamental needs at one point but doesn't go enough into explanation of what they mean in practical terms or with examples to make it useful. It's the only part of the program that is too theoretical.
- - True Qualfication: The area of "True Qualification" (a Mehow Inc. invention) is discussed with some examples, but the examples aren't very good and don't communicate it clearly enough. It needs more work. He's on the right track, but I don't see many people being able to implement it with what was given here.
- - Blind Spots in the Program: There were a few areas he under-emphasized which need to be addressed, see a bit further down in this review for details.
Originality in the PracticalAs with most of Mehow's advice very little of it is his original innovation. The concepts originate from far and wide across the dating industry - amongst others I noticed innovations brought from these dating coaches throughout the course: Mystery (Erik von Markovik), TD/ Owen Cook, Gambler (Richard la Ruina), Lovedrop (Chris Odom), Sebastian Drake, Jay Valens (Formhandle) and Jonathan Lee (Sinn). He credits some but not all of them - (Note: He's actually better than most companies at not taking credit for things he didn't invent).
Where the course does bring more value is that he gets deeper into the practical implementation details and does it by focusing on the most important points most of the time. This makes the course useful even if you have heard some of it before from the aforementioned coaches.
A lot of the value of the course is that he has done a good job of pulling together some of the better advice and ignoring the not so good, and it's pretty practical. He always gives you specific things to say and do whenever he discusses something - he never leaves you just with the theory wondering how to implement it.
Blindspots in the ProgramWhile this program is pretty comprehensive, it does have its weaknesses. Mehow has a few blindspots in the one(der) system that he ignores or under emphasizes relative to the impact they can make on results and success.
The most significant two are physical fitness and lifestyle.
- - Physical Fitness: Mehow has overcome his own limitations of being a skinny guy by compensating with other factors. As a result of having overcoming it he underplays the impact improving your physique can have - he says it's not something you should work on. While it's not a 'requirement' to improve it, working on your physical fitness does make it a lot lot easier for you. Your skills don't have to be as good to get the best results - so it's a no brainer to do. I'd put this down just to him never having 'experienced' the impact of it himself since he's never worked on fixing his skinny physique.
- - Lifestyle: He does bring the subject up and he talks around it, but it takes a big back seat to the emphasis placed on conversation. It's a pity, because you can tell from what he is saying that he has worked on his lifestyle - he just doesn't emphasize this element enough in the program especially in the section on "Keeping your One(der) girl"
- - Sexual skills: This topic isn't really touched on at all during the "Keeping her" section of the course. Sex is a huge part of relationships and can make or break any relationship. Girls will sometimes stay with you for a while based on good sex alone - even when everything else is bad, and may leave you when it's not good even when everything else is - it's that impactful - so it really had to be discussed. Perhaps mehow didn't discuss this because he doesn't give sex advice?
Slight Confusions in TerminologyFor those of you that have already studied AI (approach invitation) this topic moves off the traditional definition and Mehow uses it more liberally for approaches to meeting women while minimizing rejection. Some of what he calls AI, is just basic situational opening.
Beginners won't notice this more liberal definition - and it has no impact on the actual implementation of the advice.
Additional Highlights - Hidden GemsThe program contains some great advice on other topics not highlighted in its product description.
In particular, it has some straightforward 'getting your ex girlfriend' back advice. There are many products out there that specifically target this topic, and none of them have as good advice as this product (in fact most of them have bad advice - see reviews here: Getting Ex Back Advice).
If more advice was added to getting over the break up and filling out the process towards getting back together this would have got an Editors' Choice award on the topic of 'Getting Your Ex Back'. As it stands, it's still the best out there - so we'll be recommending guys get this if they're in that situation as it's still great advice - although not comprehensive.
The BottomlineIf you are looking for a long term relationship with a quality girl this program outlines an effective approach to get her and keep her and describes a lot of the implementation pretty well.
If you have studied a bit of advice but are still beginner and have this objective this would be a good fit for you or if you are getting success with women but are having difficulty going beyond one night stands or short relationships this will help you identify where you're going wrong and fixing it.
Hidden gem: If you are looking for a product to help you get your ex-girlfriend back - this is the best we've found to date.
This program is a great addition to the world of dating advice.
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