"Mix of Outdated/ Oversimplified Advice and Mature Relationship Tips"
October 11, 2010
FULL DETAILED REVIEW
Mature Advice and RelationshipsIf I was to say Mr. L. Rx stood out for one thing, it would be the maturity of his perspectives and advice. What do I mean by that? For a start, many of the perspectives I have towards relationships and women that took me quite a while to understand - from the accumulation of experience rather than dating advice (which didn't exist at the time) - he has included here.
Mr. L. Rx. hammers on about his philosophy with women and how it leads to healthier relationships and greater satisfaction for you. He gives you some great mindsets and ways of looking at what you should be doing if you want to ensure relationships last.
For example, his insights into the importance of women feeling 'safe' and what that means are all valuable and true. And these are often underestimated in dating advice, especially where it concerns relationship skills advice.
Some Nice Original ContentScattered throughout the book are some useful concepts that I really appreciated - examples are "negative sex talk" and "creating future". They've made it into my personal stash of useful ways of thinking about dating and relationships - that's pretty hard to do these days. Mr L. Rx's maturity shone through here again.
Ok, time to move to the not so good...
Failed Attempt to Simplify Dating AdviceIn Dating to Relating the author begins by discussing the weaknesses of other dating authors' products, and telling you why his is better. He tells you that 'women are different' and that all the other dating gurus' methods and systems don't take this into account.
"Dating to Relating's system" focuses nearly completely on different approaches for women with different personalities. On the whole it stays away from teaching you any skills that would be useful with all women, except where he talks about some general rules for relationships.
This can be very appealing to beginners, however, does it work?
The answer is that some of the approaches have some value and could work in some situations, but overall, this system doesn't work. There are two big issues with it: the approaches are outdated and the part of the system used to understand what type a woman is, doesn't work.
Outdated Dating StrategiesPerhaps these approaches given in Dating to Relating did work in the past where social dynamics were less complicated in bars / clubs. Twenty or thirty years ago, when Mr. L Rx was using these techniques the world was less complicated. People were a lot more straightforward for many reasons and it was easier to differentiate yourself.
However today, from experience, I can say the strategies given are far too simplistic. You'll basically have to get lucky to come across a girl these strategies are still relevant for. As a result, maybe these strategies will work 1 in 10 or 1 in 20 times.
In the past, the personalities of everyone were less individualistic. The growth of the availability of media and choice in the world has fueled each of us taking our own paths to more independent thinking, and as a result individual personalities. Women today are more complex than the basic types he gives us - they've had a greater range of influences and experiences.
In any of the international cities of the world which are multi-cultural, this would really come to light. If you are based in New York, London, Los Angeles or any other big city outside of the U.S. - the over simplistic approaches described will be clearer to you even more quickly.
Strange and Misleading Advice About Women's FeetAnother problem with this system is that the way 'Dating to Relating' teaches you to know what type of his personalities a woman is (lover girl, gradient girl, tease etc.) doesn't work.
This was the most curious thing I found in this book. It was out of place, because it was so bad. Mr L. Rx gives you misleading and weird advice about people's feet. He tells you that you should look at women's feet to understand what type of personality they have and the approach that will work with them. I had never heard of this, and was very dubious, so I felt compelled to do some real due diligence. I researched it and tried to find some psychological study or something to support it. Nothing. I also spent a couple of weeks checking out the feet of women and the way they stood and walked, before I spoke to them and... all I can say is, the principles he discusses had no relationship with what happened in the real world.
So if you get this - ignore everything he has to say about women's feet ;-)
More importantly though, this puts a big gap in the whole system, since you will be left to your own means to identify what type of girl she is (and the resulting dating to relating approach) you should use....
Promotion of Dating to Relating on the NetWe fast tracked the review of this product relative to others because it is heavily marketed on the Internet and some of our users have asked about it as a result. You see a lot of sites pushing the book, and saying that it is better than Double Your Dating ebook and Mystery's advice.
We had the concern that it was being pushed because of commercial incentives, rather than due to the quality of the advice.
Our conclusion is that whilst it isn't a bad product, and contains some good and at times very mature advice, it in no way deserves the hype and ratings that I've seen on some of those sites.
One of our users alerted me that Amazon.com has a lot of positive user reviews for this product.... I actually relooked over my notes when I saw this, in case I may have missed something. I hadn't. But as I went over my notes I could see how to 'beginners' to dating advice, "Dating to Relating" could come across very well. It does a good job of conveying to the reader that it is very good advice they are getting (by pointing out feasible weaknesses in other dating guru advice), and some of the advice indeed, is very good. But some of the advice is also not very good, and even misleading.
That's the advice that would lead you to waste your time trying to use some of it because it doesn't work.
The Bottom LineI personally took some nice takeaways from this book in terms of how to look at longer term relationships with women. Mr. L Rx is certainly older than the average dating coach, in his 50s, and his maturity shows through with some of his better quality advice.
On the other hand, there is some misleading advice in the book also. If you use it, you'll end up wasting a lot of time - especially if you are a beginner, which this book is aimed at. So at Dating Skills Review we don't recommmend you buy this book.
The exception I'd make, is if you have a lot of time, you've already read a fair amount of dating advice and have some experience (so you can tell what won't work) and don't mind spending the money. I did take some interesting take a ways from this book after all.
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