"A Solid "Inner Game" Book (With Solid Bonuses)"
August 01, 2009
FULL DETAILED REVIEW
How to Think RightThere are many ways to meet women, and very different approaches can actually work. Therefore, it's not so much what you DO that matters, but rather how you THINK. This book is about teaching you how to think right.
The author, Vin DiCarlo, was one of the first to talk about “Natural Game” a few years ago. One of his beliefs is that pick up is easy – just like a “natural” once told him. The less your mind is filled with details and instructions, the more spontaneous and charming you become – this is the basic concept of Natural Game (very different from the structured strategies of Mystery's Revelation or Love Systems' Magic Bullets, for example).
Well Presented and Thought OutThe ebook is well presented, with excellent graphics, classy pictures, etc – very professionally put together. Between every chapter, you get a few pages of “journal” from an imaginary student applying what you have just learned. You hear his thought processes, mistakes, and progress. While this may sound gimmicky, it is actually well written and useful for readers to relate to.
It Should Happen NaturallyThe first two chapters explain social and evolutionary psychology theories, and how those relate to Natural Game. From the research, DiCarlo concludes that attraction is a game of displaying cues of dominance. Displaying these cues should not be done through tricks and techniques but through higher level processes. That way you don't have to think how to pass tests that women give you, it just happens naturally thanks to the way you perceive yourself on the inside.
Relying too much on techniques and lines, says DiCarlo, can stop you from internalizing the core attitudes of an attractive man.
The experience of a dominant man is different from the experiences of others, not just externally in terms of projection of confidence, but also internally, as an emotional experience. In fact, it is what happens internally that makes the outward confidence possible. It is hard to fake that dominance or high status if you don’t have your internal emotions in control.
DiCarlo asks you to reflect for a second on the nature of your thoughts. You can’t control what other people think – that’s a losing battle. But you can control how YOU think. You need to THINK like a natural to become a natural.
These 2 chapters are great. You will be familiar with some/ most of the research if you have studied attraction for a while, but it is well summarized here, and most importantly it is put into new perspectives and linked to Natural Game. It certainly makes a very convincing case for “going natural” and working on mindset and thought processes instead of memorizing techniques.
The one (small) bit I had to disagree with was this quote: “For a woman to feel attraction for a particular man, it’s absolutely essential that he have a higher perceived status than she does.” … which is wrong and simplistic in my experience. But that’s just a small gripe.
Female PsychologyThe third chapter focuses on female psychology. From the very start DiCarlo says something I’ve thought for years but never saw mentioned before: the idea that women are "more emotional than men" and “make no sense “is rubbish. Women make just as much sense as men do, if you can understand their perspective.
DiCarlo goes on to explain how women think – and it directly relates to the previous chapter. Women care less about what you say than about what you do, and that is rooted in your character, which itself is dependent on how you think. Again, we go back to the idea of getting your thoughts straightened out.
One problem with the standard “techniques” and memorizing openers, DiCarlo says, is that it makes you see women as robots, concepts, or opponents. This is bad because then a genuine connection is difficult. You need to see women, and enjoy them, as individuals. Women are your team mates, in that they want what you want (great fun, a great mate, great sex, etc). Again, excellent advice that goes against a lot of the usual clichés you hear from dating coaches from the “pick up artist community”.
Quote: “Stop trying to control women. Instead, understand them, pay attention, and control yourself.”
The chapter elaborates on compliance, frames, and the different types of tests women give you. All good stuff.
The Attraction CodeThe last chapter details the “attraction code” itself. This is the most abstract and theoretical part of the book, and I was yawning a bit at times.
It’s not that the content is bad, but it is made overcomplicated and goes in to a lot of different directions - without much transition to link everything up. There is a lot of new jargon (State Frictions? Intention-Violation?) and sub-divisions and listing going on. You go from the 4 Elements of Personality (4EP) to the 11 Laws of an Attractive Identity to the 3 State Frictions to the 3 Shaping techniques, with some stuff in between. Although each individual piece is valuable, it feels a bit thrown together in a hurry.
What stood out most in this chapter was the “Quick And Dirty Guide to Manufacturing Confidence” and the “Instruction Manual to Your Mind”. This ties back to the previous chapters – after explaining that WHAT you think is key, he gives you the tools to change HOW you think. Here you learn to be in the moment, improve your focus and keep your thoughts strongly streamlined in a positive, seductive direction.
BonusesWith the main ebook you also receive 5 bonus books. We have reviewed the most popular of these, DiCarlo Escalation Ladder 2nd Edition and No Flakes! ebook. The others include Secrets of Sexual Tension, Objection Game and Get Your Girl Back (by Jay Cataldo).
The Bottom Line - An Excellent “Inner Game/ Confidence” BookThe advertising says this is not an inner game and confidence product, and I have no idea why, since that’s essentially what it is - it is a “mindset” book. And there is nothing wrong with that, especially since it explains not only inner game and confidence but how to actually get it, and does so in an engaging, simple way.
While the content is great, the obvious limitation is the near total absence of techniques. This is a broad roadmap. A beginner finishing this book will most likely say “oh WOW, I learned A LOT” but his next thought may also be “Hmm ok, so what do I do now?”. This is somewhat compensated by some of the bonus ebooks you receive with your purchase, and hey, you can’t get it all.
For a beginner book that emphasizes techniques more check out the Double your Dating ebook.
The Attraction Code is not for advanced guys, but it will be very beneficial for beginners to intermediates. It simplifies the game of dating considerably, and the content is both of quality and (mostly) easy to understand and accept.
If you don’t want to pretend to be something you are not, this introduction to Natural Game is well worth checking out.
Was this review helpful to you?