There is shortcut that many men take towards their girl lives that they have to pay for dearly later. If you are someone who just wants to find a decent girlfriend to settle with. Thinking that many of your issues, concerns and bad days will disappear once she's there.
Stop.
Have you had a girlfriend before? How did the relationship end? My guess is that it left you feeling a bit helpless afterwards. Out of control. Perhaps even alone. This happens to all of us at some point - unless we've been blessed with a certain type of gene pool and upbringing. But very very few men are lucky to get those two conditions met. It has happened to me too.
It was after this happened to me for the third time, feeling empty. And yes, alone. That I thought maybe I'm doing something wrong here. So I stopped looking for a girlfriend. I quit the mission for a whole year and strangely found that more girls were taking an interest in me.
This is just one of the lessons we learn from what is called dating skills. If you are needy, or in need of a girlfriend, or more to the point, girl attention. Then the girls or a girlfriend will not be attracted to you.
So, stop, is actually a pretty good way to sum up the first step to getting a girlfriend.
The first step is to stop needing to search for one. Not necessarily to stop looking for one. But to stop feeling that need to have one. Because that kills relationships right before they start. And the truth is, that it slowly kills any relationship you have with a girlfriend also - so you quickly find yourself alone any time you do get one.
Knowing "How Not to Get a Girlfriend" is a lot more important than knowing how to it turns out. Just because just by eliminating a lot of the bad behaviors, the number of girls in our lives rise quickly.
The problem of course is that most men don't know what a bad behavior vs. a good behavior is when it comes to women. Women are a mystery and seem to want different things from us. That isn't actually true. The truth is that women communicate differently, but they want the same things that we want more or less.
An easy way to get round this problem is a psychological trick. We call this 'inner game & confidence skills'. This sounds a little complicated, but what it really means is that you learn how to feel and act confidently all the time. Why? Because confidence attracts women. It also stops them from leaving you.
The trick part is that you don't need to understand women, or know how to respond to them to make things work. You just have to learn how to feel confident and you will naturally do the right things. It's part of evolutionary psychology and gets a little complicated, so let's not worry about the details. The important thing to understand is that without this, it's literally impossible to not make mistakes with women, either when trying to get a girlfriend.. or trying to keep one.
This brings me to the most important part, about how you should get a girlfriend.
When you are ready for one.
What do I mean by this? Well, confidence with women comes from experience. For many men, unfortunately, they have little dating experience because every time they meet a new girl she becomes their girlfriend and they stop dating. So they've literally had next to no experience. If you had had that little experience with your work, would you feel confident doing it? The answer is no.
Unfortunately not having general confidence with women can undermine our relationships and make it harder to keep girlfriends. So having some experience, having stayed out in the field, and not gone straight into a new relationship - is a good way to prepare for longer term relationships in the future.
I know this may sound counter intuitive - but believe me it works. Learn to feel comfortable with women by getting a little more experience and not looking for a girlfriend. Just dating. And you will be setting yourself up for a much better future with women and a great girlfriend - in a relationship that lasts.
As you can imagine, our Dating Skills Review editorial team has reviewed hundreds of systems and tools that show you how to get a girlfriend. Unfortunately many of them suck. In our database you'll find many that we've rated as low as 2 out of 10 ("Poor"). On the other hand, there is also some pretty good advice out there that works. That helps you stop the bad habits and behaviors that are turning the girls you like away from you. And that teaches you techniques and behaviors that get girls to like you.
| |||
